Ain't No Queen Climbing My Back

   Many of you heard many Black Gay Men say "ain't not queen climbing my back." This means that feminine tops are disqualified from topping feminine bottoms. Now don't get me wrong, this butch queen has had his share of topping glory. However, Many masculine as well as feminine gays automatically assume that a bottom is feminine and a top is masculine.  It is also stated that "inbetween" gays are versatile.

 This saying has been around for ages.  A "Queen" (Kween) is described often as a feminine gay man or one who doesn't quite fit the stereotypical guise or societal view of what a man is suppose to be. For Society a man is to be rough, tough and hard while a woman is the dainty, flower of the group. However it is not always so. 

  The fact is that there are feminine Gay Men. They are in every race, ethnic background culture, religion.  Despite efforts to conform to the social norm, they stand out like a sore thumb on a whore in church. Referring to the previous post, Feminine Gay men are deemed undesirable. This proves true when it comes to topping or being the one to penetrate during sex.

  Many guys Masculine and Feminine will often say "ain't no queen climbing my back."  This means that if they let a feminine Top top them and they are masculine, this will emasculate them aka make them look like a punk or they will (gasp) become feminine.  I wonder where in gay hell that notion came from.  You're two SGL (Same Gender Loving) individuals that love doing the same gender as you. Why would you feel that just because one is a little less masculine that they will emasculate you by doing what is considered a dominating act in the bedroom?

  To me it makes no sense.  Now there are some masculine bottoms who love feminine tops and other feminine bottoms that love feminine tops, however on most hook up sites such as Jack'd, A4A, BGC, Grindr, you hear "I only deal with masculine tops and fem bottoms." Then you have the kind that accept no femininity at all.

  It's funny however there are many "Queens" who will go through the notion of butching it up or acting masculine just so they can say that they top a masculine or feminine dude.  Granted, I did that for a while, but it lead to me hating myself and really being confused about who I am.  I may be a butch queen, but I do know my worth and I be damned if I let anyone down me for being who I am and for liking certain things in the sensual sense. I refuse to be looked at as a second class citizen because I'm not "man enough."

  I've learned the same ones that holler "ain't no queen climbing my back,"  are the main ones getting their walls broken down buy someone else's top. Like Momma always said "your top is someone else's bottom."  Let's be real.  It's all about who is dominant.  Really, to me it is all a mind game. 

  As, and I say this especially to the Black Gay Community, what's wrong with letting a "Queen" climb your back?  They may do it better that some of these "real dudes" that you been let hit it wrong.

Musique.